“Mom, can I go outside?”
“Can I climb that tree?”
“Can I paint on the easel?”
“Mom, can we go to the park?”
What’s your first reaction to those rapid-fire questions?
Unfortunately, mine was usually “No.” Especially when surrounded by four little boys – multiply those questions by four, and imagine what kind of outrageous ideas boys can get!
(One of my favorites is, “Do you think you can slice a banana with a ceiling fan?” I did give that one a “No.”)
I remember my mom saying to me once, “Just say yes as much as you can. Save the 'no's for the important things.” It was wise advice.
Besides, what fun is a No Mom? I sometimes said no just because it was easier. Then I found out it wasn’t so much easier after all, because the boys needed a change of pace. They needed a diversion, something physical, something creative, a walk in the park.
Sometimes you have to say no, and there are good reasons. Don’t feel guilty about those – you’re the mom! But before you shake your head no, stop and think.
Save as many “no”s as you can. You may need them later!
What's the craziest idea your child has had ... so far?
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14 comments:
It's something I've been working on lately, saying "yes" more. We are blessed that since we moved (say post, just different housing area) that we have our own yard and lots of kids my kids ages. I pray we're making great memories with the kids and that as they look back and remember they do it with a smile and a "Remember when we did....."
I love saying yes...or at the very least, "not that but how about this"
Good reminder! :O) Have a great week.
Early on in my parenting, I was definitely a No Mom; but once my third child came along, I realized that everyone's happier when the "yes's" outweigh the "no's"...including me! Now that I have three teenagers, my "no's" are thoughtful ones and respected as such. Your mom gave you great advice!
Good advice, Laura. One we as moms have to be intentionally about!!
Thanks, Laura!
I need this reminder frequently. I am bad about saying, "I'm too busy (or tired) today. Maybe tomorrow."
That is GREAT advice! I am trying to be better at being a "yes" mom and I'm going to remember that saying to help me get there!
Good words of advice!
I am trying to be a "yes" mom more and more, but some days I forget this goal of mine. Thank you for this reminder!
Great advice! I love the ceiling fan banana slicing question!
When have I said no? When I caught one child carving his name into his headboard with a pocket knife. (Ben's bed still has Be on it--sort of an existential thing now that he's a teen.)
Other no's? Bows and arrows in the back yard, homemade explosives (that was an easy one,) and no to my youngest when he was six and wanted to paint his room black.
I love that banana slicing idea. So funny! I agree with this all the way. Good one, Laura.
I admit, I'm a no mom. I often say that no is my default. But after reading a post about saying yes by Ann Voskamp at A Holy Experience earlier in the year (I think it was in January), I decided to try to yes more often. I've written about it quite a bit on the blog -- it's been liberating...and a little scary!
Hi Laura,
It's wonderful to meet you! I would love if you joined in Imperfect Prose on Thursdays... I love your blog, and the idea of being a Yes Mom. I'm going to try that with my son. Your blog is so inspiring! And you're a fellow author :) Bless you. e.
What an adorable blog!! Thank you so much for visiting mine I will be sure to be back here soon!
Ginger~
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