My baby enters his last teenage year today.
I texted him a Happy Birthday message early this morning, standing next to the couch that I practically lived on after his emergency c-section.
He was fine, I was fine, but I was bluer after him than I had been with any of the other boys. Part of it was the fact that this was the end of the line. I couldn’t help lamenting that I wouldn’t do this again.
It didn’t last long, but I do remember the desperate feeling of not being able to pull myself out. I remember my mother’s sage advice: Honey, you have to enjoy today, right now, with this little one. Don’t miss this time with him.
And I remember asking my husband to ask one of our pastor friends to pray for me. When I relive that moment, I can hear the plea in my voice: Tell Eric to pray for me – really pray for me, okay?
I don’t remember an “aha” moment or anything. I can’t recall suddenly waking up with a smile on my face. But ever-so-gradually, my spirit awakened.
A lot of life has been like that for me, looking back. It hasn’t been filled with marching bands and lightning strikes, but warmth and a steady faithfulness.
I read this again this morning, and it really resonated in my spirit:
"Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness.” (Lamentations 3:22,23)
When I think of my last teenager in his last adolescent year, I get a lump in my throat. But then I remember – His mercies are new every morning. And He is faithful.
P.S. Happy birthday, boy!
Linking up today with Jen.How about you? How has His faithfulness helped you along?
7 comments:
I feel your sadness and happiness all at the same time. I had some moments like this yesterday and somehow I don't think it gets any easier. Happy birthday to your baby and I hope it's a good day for you too!
I loved the phrase "warm and steady faithfulness" This is a such a sweet post. Happy birthday to your boy!
This is such a beautiful post - such a testimony that when we are empty, He is able to fill us up again.
So glad you linked this up!
Oh, how well I remember the bittersweet memory of my last born in his last teenage year. He is a birthday boy this month too, although he is a grown man, out on his own in another state with a great career and a strong faith. It's so hard to believe my baby son is soon turning 23! Thanks for the lovely thoughts today -- morning by morning new mercies we see from our great and faithful God.
Awww. Such a sweet picure! Is that your hand and him?
Awww, Happy Birthday to your boy/man! I know the feeling.
Indeed...we are not consumed...except by more love.
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